Only in the Land of the Free !!

He may well just be doing it because he can or because he dislikes banks , but whatever the reason its a fair guess that Dalton Chiscolm is enjoying himself at the moment – he is currently suing the Bank of America for a record 1748 billion trillion dollars or in real money

$ 17,840,000,000,000,000,000,000 ( + an additional $200m )

The reason he gives , not that he really needs to , is that he received what he considered bad customer service. The judge in New york hearing the case , Denny Chin , is the same judge who recently sentenced Madoff. He has given Chiscolm till 23 October to justify the size of the claim or it will be dismissed

Chen called the lawsuit incomprehensible !! – not really if you dislike banks enough and you never know , the Bank of America may settle

( photo reuters )

Way to go , Tonka

An unnamed three year old Canadian kid went for the ride of his lfe recently , though not in a way that would  be recommended for other kids. Out celebrating his birthday in a play park , his parents left him happily riding around on his brand new truck and playing with other members of his family.

Somehow he manged to esacpe , and was next spotted floating down a local river  , still quite happily sitting on his truck , some tweleve kilometres ( just under eight miles ) away near Fort St John , British Columbia , apparently oblivious to his surroundings.

Apparently , he was very excited to see the local police , according to the RCMP , and was duly rescued and returned to very surprised and relieved parents . Perhaps most important from his point of view  was that the truck was also rescued unharmed 

All that was missing was a fireman and a builder really !

Real Monkey Business

Press conferences are , in some way at least ,meant  to be  a bit of a p.r. exercise for the person giving them – not what happened to the unfortunate President of Zambia a few weeks ago , who was in the middle of his talk to assorted journalists and dignitaries , when he was quite literally p'd on from a great height.

The intent was to have the president , Rupiah Banda , sitting in the opulant grounds of his state house , surrounded by luscious looking plants and shrubbery.

This he was , but unfortunately he was also positioned underneath a bunch of trees when a monkey , playing in the branches above him , suddenly decided to relieve itself and urinate all over him , much to everyone's amusement .

There are probably numerous morals to be drawn from this , perhaps the most obvious being about sitting under trees where monkeys play and live .

The less obvious one may be that its actually quite a subliminal way of getting people to feel sorry for you , which has to be a good idea for any politician , even a wet one !

Do as the French Do

Great quote from the Economist on the plight of the world economy as it is currently affecting France

'French workers held the boss of their factory hostage as they sought to renegotiate redundancy packages. It is the second time a boss has been held hostage in France recently over lay-offs. Others have merely been pelted with eggs'

Something to remember me by

Great story on the bbc newsbeat page about an eighteen year old kid who's gone off travelling and has left his parents a reminder of him – a drawing of a very very large willy ( sixty feet long ! ) , which he has painted on the roof of their home in Berkshire , England . Apparently it took him a year to draw it and his parents have only just found out – bet he'll get a great welcome home present !

story and pic here

And its off to jail we go

SYDNEY — An Australian school bus driver hit in the back of the head by a hard sweet has become a local hero after taking his unruly students to the police station to report their crime ……

full story

Trust me I’m an actor

BEIJING (Reuters) – China has banned actors and other "non-accredited personnel" from playing medical experts in advertisements for drugs after an Internet-led witch-hunt exposed a number of bogus experts, state media reported on Monday …

full story

Boasting again !

A report by  a German  based consultancy has come to the surprising conclusion that the French have the need for the biggest size range of condoms , with the obvious implication that their gaulic manhood's put the rest of the world to shame.

The survey by a very serious sounding German company , The Institute of Condom Consulting , approached 10500 men in 25 different countries , over an eighth month period ,asking them to measure the size of their penis and enter the result ( anonymously  ! ) in a database , which then came up with these results.

Its not entirely clear why this survey was done , apparently for educational purposes , or possibly to draw attention to this company's great ongoing project that they are developing , a spray on condom , which they describe as being  a bit like a  car wash  !

I can’t live (or die) without you

(Reuters) – A Taiwan man grieving over the death of his girlfriend climbed inside a morgue freezer to be with her and was only pulled out alive half an hour later, media and an official said on Tuesday…..

full story

New meaning for organ donation !!

HUSAVIK, Iceland (Reuters) – Sigurdur Hjartarson is missing a human penis. But he’s not worried: four men have promised to donate theirs to him when they die.

Hjartarson is founder and owner of the Icelandic Phallological Museum, which offers visitors from around the world a close-up look at the long and the short of the male reproductive organ.

His collection, which began in 1974 with a single bull’s penis that looked something like a riding crop, now boasts 261 preserved members from 90 species……

full story/reuters